What Do The Children See?

 I read long ago that a parent should never do anything on their own. From grocery shopping to going to the bank a parent should always take at least one child. Life is filled with many unexpected teaching opportunities that cannot be taught in a lecture but are taught by modelling. Parents teach by example and there is no better example than how we interact with people in our community.

We often believe that what we say to our children will have the biggest impact but the loudest thing we say is said with our actions. Children are watching our response as that crazy driver cuts us off. They see what kind of respect we give to the new bank teller. They read our body language as we wait in the grocery line as that dear old soul counts out her change.

Our children are going to become what they see in us. They will use the same words we use. They will exude our attitude toward people. How often do you hear your parents' words coming out of your mouth? How often do you see your parents' attitude in your actions? Do we need to choose better words and a better attitude?

I try to remember to bring my children along but sometimes I fail and go with the fast route instead of the slow one, but yesterday I remembered. I took my six year old son on the dog walk. We walked. We talked. We enjoyed each others company. And he observed my actions without me realizing it.

I have a habit of trying to leave the world in better condition than I found it. For this purpose I carry extra dog bags on me to clean up where someone else failed to. My son was a few steps ahead of me when I stopped to clean up someone else's mess. I didn't think he noticed. But when we got home he announced to his mom, "Alison didn't go poo but dad used a bag to clean up another dog's poo". My wife gave me a look that conveyed "good job". But it's not just children who are watching.

Last year I was walking with the dog past our local park. There was a lot of litter so I picked up a few pieces and put them in the garbage. When I turned around I almost bumped into a man who was walking with his children. I hadn't seen them walking behind me but he had seen what I was doing. He smiled and gave me a thumbs up. Because they were walking faster than my dog they went ahead of me. To my surprise the dad suddenly stooped down and picked up a discarded coffee cup. He said something to his kids who suddenly ran ahead and started picking up garbage. I thought, "Wow!"

This is the world in which we live, raise our kids and minister. We are told not to be overcome by evil but to overcome evil with good. But it can seem overwhelming. It can make us feel powerless and insignificant. We are only one person so what are we compared to all that? But Father did not tell us to do all that. He told us to be faithful to what he has given us. I can't impact my whole town but I can impact my children and the people I meet today. I may not be able to preach but I can demonstrate Father's heart by the way I honour and value people. I may feel insignificant but I can do significant things by doing the next right thing as defined by Father.

This is the attitude and the demonstration that will most impact our children. I can tell them I love Jesus or I can show them in the way I treat their mother, our neighbours and the workers in our community. I can demonstrate it in the way I talk about leaders in the church and politics. I can demonstrate it by living an attitude that tells them people are more important than possessions. My children may forget my words but they will remember what they have seen. To Father, there is nothing more important in our lives than people. They are the objects of his love and I want my children to see this reflected in my actions.

The children are watching. They are suppose to. It is how they learn. What are we teaching beyond our words?

Our Actions Reveal Our Hearts

What is our great and overwhelming desire? Many people are not able to put it into words. Many people live without direction and purpose. Many people are propelled forward by the circumstances of their lives, not determining their course but allowing the "elements" to determine it for them. They live, eat, drink, breathe, and, eventually, stop doing all of these things, never having an understanding of why they are doing them. That was never our Creator's intention for us.

If nothing else we should at least be able to express the same basic desire Moses had:

Now therefore, I pray, if I have found grace in Your sight, show me now Your way, that I may know You and that I may find grace in Your sight. (Exodus 33:13)


"Show me your way, that I may know you." There is no greater purpose we could have than that of discovering Yahweh's way with the intent to know him. It is the reason we read our Bibles, pray, worship, meditate, serve; to discover his ways so that we may know him. We certainly don't do it to please anyone else and it is not because we think these things save us. Only Jesus saves us, but these things are means to discover Yahweh's ways so that we may know him.

How does knowing his ways make it possible for us to know him? If you truly want to know a person live with him for a week and observe what he does. Our actions, including our mistakes and reaction to them, reveal our heart. How we treat people, react in situations, plan out our days, handle interruptions, show who we are by revealing our priorities, where we see ourselves in relationships and what our values are. This is also true of Yahweh.

The entire Old Testament reveals his heart to us by showing us who he is in relation to his creation. We discover a Holy God whose standards come from that holiness. Yet despite these standards he showed grace and mercy more often than justice. He is a God of justice but his love is revealed by his response of mercy and grace. How patient he was with Israel despite her constant disobedience. He warned her that one infraction to his standards would send her exiled from the land he has given her. Instead he patiently tried to correct her, generation after generation, but she would not turn back from her rebellion until he finally responded with justice. But even this justice was a tool of correction for the purpose of restoring her, because he is a God of covenant, and he does not give up. This shows us his heart toward us, and despite our sin, he does not desire justice as much as he desires mercy, forgiveness, grace and restoration.

It is a great thing to find purpose in desiring to know Yahweh's ways with the motive of knowing him. If only this was our prayer, one that we sincerely put into action every day. To know him better is also Yahweh's desire for us. It is all part of the reason that he paid the price he did through Jesus on the cross. It was all an act of love so that we would have the capability to draw near to him, to discover his heart and to possess one desire above all others: To be with him for eternity.

What Are Your Actions Saying About Jesus?

We talk big. We really do. We have a lot to say about our God and about our relationship with him. It is all good stuff and it should be very encouraging to people. The only problem is that we are often hypocritical in our actions. We say that we love Jesus but then we don't always do what he says. We say we trust Jesus but we seem to have a break down as soon as we face any difficulty. We say that we walk with him but don't spend any time in the Word or in prayer. We say that we want what he wants, we want to live his will, but then we never take time to understand that will and just do what we think is best. People stop listening because of our inconsistency.

We need to jealously guard the testimony Jesus has given us and we need to be consistent in our witness. We should never be afraid of weakness in the face of adversity because he loves to glorify himself through our weaknesses. The Word tells us that he searches the earth looking for those who are loyal to him so he can reveal himself through their weakness. This is not unlike the famous passage where the apostle Paul is shown this truth and declares he wants to be weak always so that Jesus can be revealed in him.

Consider Ezra for a moment. He came from a long line of priests and was a scribe of the law of Moses. Ezra was also in captivity. But this was the time of the great release, when it was put in the hearts of the foreign kings to release the children of Yahweh and to support the rebuilding of Jerusalem and the Temple. I imagine Ezra had spent a long time explaining Yahweh and Israel to the king and even bragged about the power of Yahweh.

The king commissioned Ezra to return to Jerusalem and make offerings on his behalf. He loaded him down with officials and lots of money so it is obvious that Ezra's words must have had an impact. But then those words were put to the test. The empire was huge and hard to police so travel was dangerous. It was only natural that with all that money Ezra should request an armed escort. But Ezra was sensitive to the words, the testimony he had spoken to the king:

For I was ashamed to request of the king an escort of soldiers and horsemen to help us against the enemy on the road, because we had spoken to the king, saying, “The hand of our God is upon all those for good who seek Him, but His power and His wrath are against all those who forsake Him.” So we fasted and entreated our God for this, and He answered our prayer. (Ezra 8:22-23)

It may seem like a little thing to you but it speaks volumes to me that Ezra was jealous for the reputation of Yahweh. He had told the king that Yahweh's favour rested upon all those who served him. Imagine how that testimony would have been diminished if Ezra had asked for protection. So he did what we all should do, he fasted and prayed until the Lord's will and direction were made clear to him. They were protected by Yahweh and the testimony stood.

Sometimes we are guilty of bragging about things that we are not prepared to live. It is easy to talk of trust until we are put in a desperation situation where we have to exercise that trust. It is easy to talk to others about faith until we are in a situation where we have to lean only on the promises of Jesus. The worse times are when we have a choice to either trust Jesus or to ask the world for help. Too many of us turn to the world and allow our testimony to fall. We should not speak of anything that we are not willing to put into action because we will be held accountable for our words.

I think it would be a good thing if we decided to be more transparent and honest with ourselves and those in our sphere of testimony. Sometimes we have to grow into trust and faith but we need to be aware of it so we can speak our testimony in such a way. We are just beginners in this relationship so we should not claim to be something we are not. We are learning to trust, learning to obey, learning to walk by faith. Our desire should always be to have our walk match our talk. When our words are put to the test, as they were for Ezra, we shouldn't shrink back but instead throw ourselves into the arms of Jesus, seeking his strength and direction. It is good to brag about the Lord but it is even better to allow him to glorify himself in your weakness so the whole world can see him in us. That is our purpose.

What Does A Christian Look Like?

These are confusing days we are living in, especially if you are trying to figure out how a Christian is suppose to think and act. So many voices. So many opinions. And that is just in the Church. Let's add in the pressure from the media and special interest groups. There is also the mounting opinion of a changing society, calling wrong right and right wrong. But no one can dictate to you what God has or has not said. You have it right there in your hand, the Word of God, and you are possessed by the great teacher, the Holy Spirit. As a Christian you are not into opinions; yours or anyone else's. All that matters is the Father's will.

Paul has given us a good idea of what we should look like when we are possessed by the Spirit and bent on doing the Father's will:

- running from temptation
- doing what is right (God's definition, not society's)
- being faithful
- being loving
- easy to get along with

And then we hit our Achilles heal:

Stay away from stupid and senseless arguments. (2 Timothy 2:23)

How many times have you been pulled into stupid and senseless arguments over disputable matters? We didn't mean to go there but we just wanted to correct their thinking or understanding on something. Before we know it we are in a huge argument and people are being hurt.Was it worth it? Did we make our point? Will that person ever be open to talking with us again?

Stay away from stupid and senseless arguments. These only lead to trouble, and God’s servants must not be troublemakers. (2 Timothy 2:23-24)

True, so very true. Often times we are not to teach but simply to share our testimony. We tell people what Jesus has done for us or maybe something that happened this week that shows his great grace. Not everyone is a teacher. I am a teacher and I still avoid senseless arguments.

Sometimes arguments are senseless because the person is not yet ready to receive. I am having an ongoing discussion with one gentleman who has been influenced by some Mormon teaching. He actually believes that only 144,000 people will get into heaven. I discussed the truth of this with him but his reply was "It all depends on interpretation". I could see that this discussion was only going to do more damage than good so I changed the subject. We will re-visit this topic again but at that particular moment he was closed to anything I had to say. It became a stupid and senseless argument.

Paul says that we are not to be troublemakers. We are not here to force anything on anyone. Like Jesus, we make ourselves available, we talk about Jesus to everyone and spend time with those who want to know more. It is their choice if they do not want to receive the good news we have to share. But that doesn't stop us from loving them or showing them compassion. Paul says of us:

They must be kind to everyone, and they must be good teachers and very patient. (v. 24b) 

Of being teachers and correctors I will write more tomorrow but for today, drink in this image that Paul has given to us of what a servant of Jesus Christ looks like. The most important things are, study the Word and listen to the Spirit. Know the difference between your voice and that of the Spirit's. After God, people are the most important thing in your life. Learn how to treat people according to the Father's will and you will be a faithful servant of the King.

Reaction Or Response?

In yesterday's blog I mentioned how we respond to people matters. At all times we are representing Jesus Christ, our King. As his representatives it is important for us to set aside our reactions and allow the Holy Spirit to respond through us. The character of Jesus should be evident to everyone who knows us, meets us and happens to bump into us:

Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone. (Colossians 4:6) 

There is a difference between reacting and responding. Reaction is a knew-jerk thing. Someone does something and your flesh takes over before you can even process it. Words fly out of your mouth. Your body goes into action. Your emotions boil over. The only time a reaction is good is when we are jumping out of the way of a bus.

Any time we are reacting to someone it is almost always an emotional thing and usually those emotions are hurt or anger. We lash back with words that we may later regret. We may slam our fist against a wall to express our reaction, or maybe throw something but hopefully never hit anyone. We allow the emotion to take over, flood our heart and mind and deafen us to the Spirit.

A response is much different. It comes after we have all the facts and have considered things from perspectives beyond our own. It gives us time to hear and be directed from the Holy Spirit. It takes the effort of the emotions to control us and submits it under the control of the Spirit. It recognizes there is more at stake here than just our emotions, rights, desires.

When we decide to respond instead of react to a person we are giving the love of Jesus time to work itself in and through us. Our words are full of grace and seasoned with salt. We speak wisdom into the situation. We remove ourselves from the formula and instead of being a victim we become the minister. We minister Jesus' love, mercy and grace into the situation.

There is nothing saying that the person we are responding to doesn't deserve a tongue lashing or worse. Perhaps they deserve justice for what they did but if our God was only concerned with justice we would not be where we are today. Grace, mercy, compassion, understanding, patience and love is what should be seen in us, produced by the Spirit and given our permission to determine our response.

There is never an excuse to react in kind to anyone. There is never an excuse to yell at someone or to shake our fist at them. There is never an excuse to swear, use vulgar language or anything that would destroy our witness for Jesus. There is never an excuse to treat people poorly or to purposefully try to hurt them. It doesn't matter how tired we are, angry, upset, distraught. In all things we must remain submit to the Holy Spirit and allow him to direct us in our response to people. In all things allow the love of Jesus to be our guide. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.

Be Wise In Your Actions

Our actions matter. Sometimes we forget and we get lazy in our attitude. It is very much a "let your hair down" society now. Almost anything goes. It's your life so you can do with it what you want. Unfortunately when we expect little of people that is exactly what we get, little.

People need encouragers in their lives. They need someone who will stand in their corner and cheer them on. Children need parents who won't allow them to sink to the lowest common denominator but encourage them to go beyond the norm. Children need to hear that God has given them the capacity to do great things as he works through them. They need to dream and to have visions.

The world needs to hear that there is a plan in place to move them beyond this point. Most people are seeking something better, they just don't know yet that God has planned better things for them. Most people are stuck in the "what you see is what you get" and can't possibly imagine the wonderful things God intends for them to have and to experience. They need someone in their corner, cheering them on to discover the better things.

People actually believe that a loveless marriage is normal. Others have settled for a joyless job. Many think turbulent teenage years are just something that has to be lived through. People have come to accept hopelessness, despair and depression as part of life. They need encouragers to tell them different.

Paul says to the Colossians:

Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. (Colossians 4:5)

Be wise in the way you interact with people who have yet to discover the love and joy of the Lord. Be careful how you respond to them. Remember they need encouragers.

Don't respond in your flesh but in the Spirit. If you are dealing with an angry person, rude, vulgar, inconsiderate, just remind yourself that they are without Jesus and you can't expect anything more from them, but God has planned something better for them. So when you respond you do so knowing this is an opportunity to demonstrate the love and grace of Jesus. Even if they were to spit in our face we must continue in the character of Jesus.

I have a part-time job dealing with people. Our policy is that if someone is yelling and swearing we are to give them three warnings and then hang up. Jesus did not set any such policy. We live as if he did. If someone offends us we carry on as if we have a right to cut them out of our life. But Jesus told us to love them, to pray for those who persecute us. Very much different from the way we conduct ourselves.

Too often we respond in kind. If someone is rude to us we are rude back. If someone yells at us we yell back. We hold to our rights and are offended they assaulted us. We conveniently forget the "turn the other check". We ignore the instruction that if someone sues us for our shirt that we should give him our coat as well. Or how about if we are forced to walk one mile we should walk two? If we don't feel the need to love these people then we need to re-examine our relationship with Jesus. A relationship with him should be transforming our heart and mind.

Personal rights are set aside when we are dealing with "outsiders". Instead of thinking of ourselves we must always be making the most of every opportunity. It doesn't mean something positive will come out of every encounter but we are making the most out of it. We need to show a lot more wisdom than we have been, setting ourselves aside and allowing the Spirit to operate through us, to bring conviction to the hearts of those without Jesus. A smile on our face and kindness in our heart often opens the door to many opportunities. Its all about Jesus.